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The XFL: Extreme Exploitation! by Mikki Halpin According to Lucas Swineford, the "X" in the title of the new football league the XFL doesn't stand for "extreme," as most people assume. Swineford, a columnist on the league's official Web site XFL.com, writes "X is just a cool letter that has come to identify a demographic and an aggressive lifestyle." Isn't that clever? X is a cool letter. Think of the great X's in history. There's the band X, Malcolm X, The X-Files, and, as every pirate knows, the X that marks the spot. But in this case, the more I read about the XFL, the more this particular X seems to stand for "exploitation." The media has been eagerly awaiting the debut of this alternative football league since its formation was announced earlier this year. Vince McMahon, the CEO and chief myth builder of the hugely successful WWF, hopes to spin the wrestling audience he's got now into a multi-city, multimillion dollar rival to the NFL. ESPN, Sports Illustrated, and the other sycophants of professional sports have been at his side all the way, detailing everything from the drafting process and the schedule to each franchise's uniform design and the cheerleader tryouts (more on them later). The premise of the XFL is to take everything the NFL has and amp it up. McMahon promises more action, more laughs, more thrills, and more drama. He told CNN/SI, "When they see our presentation, our brand of football, they're going to say, 'Geez, I sure wish the NFL was like this.'" What he is likely to provide, and which no one seems to point out, are more injuries, more drug abuse, more sexual objectification, and less advocating for the rights of the athletes. Let's look at what he's really promising: MORE INJURIES: McMahon wants to make the game faster and more visceral than the football we currently see. The changes include a 35-second play clock, 10 minutes for halftime, elimination of the "fair catch" rule, and punts being live balls. With less time to recover between plays and more exposure to hits, players are sure to feel the brunt of this XFL feature. MORE DRUGS: Obviously, drug use increases as injuries increase. Players use steroids and stimulants to help them get out on the field again. The WWF was troubled by federal investigations of drug use, but is not currently subject to any oversight because McMahon redefined it as "sports entertainment." When the product is entertainment, there's no athletic commission, and voila! No more investigations. Obviously, professional sports in general and the NFL in particular are hardly a zero-tolerance zone, but the XFL promises to outdo others in this area. (The XFL at this time still claims to be a pure sports play.) MORE SEX: The XFL has made much of the cheerleading squads. A series of steamy commercials featuring scantily clad ladies has been generating interest, along with public tryouts in franchise cities. McMahon has claimed that the cheerleaders will be encouraged to date the players, and that frank discussion of this dating will be part of each broadcast. He told ESPN magazine, "When the quarterback fumbles or the wideout drops a pass - and we know who he's dating -- I want our reporters right back in her face on the sidelines demanding to know whether the two of them did the wild thing last night." Um, gross. MORE DESPERATE ATHLETES: The XFL is specifically recruiting players who didn't make it as pros and, in many cases, who didn't go to college either. They rarely have representation to help them negotiate a good contract, and there is no players' union to protect them. Now, don't get me wrong. I like to see over-the-top stunts as much as the next person. But just as I wish strip clubs allowed the dancers to unionize and gave them all health insurance, I wish McMahon's new league was more honest about what it is up to. Wouldn't it be cool if the XFL got really extreme? I have some ideas. |
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