 |
 |
 |
|
 |
|
 |
|
Kay
Tennessee
|
|
Damn, I can't believe I acted like that!
|
|
 |
|
12-23
|
Weeda
San Diego, CA
|
|
I ate ranch beans for breakfeast.
|
|
|
|
12-21
|
Linda Carlucci
Waterloo, IA
|
|
I'm in my manic phase.
|
|
|
|
12-16
|
Scott
Custer
|
|
I'm Coo Coo for Katie Puffs!!!
|
|
|
|
12-15
|
Candace
Jordan, MI
|
|
Tom Cruise teeders on the edge of heart throb and creepy old man.
|
|
|
|
12-14
|
Linda
San Diego, CA
|
|
Did you for get your prozac this morning!
|
|
|
|
12-14
|
Vern
Calgary
|
|
I am now old enough to act senial
|
|
|
|
12-13
|
Rob Hogue
Antigo, WI
|
|
OMG A MOUSE! AHHHH HOLD ME OPRAH!
|
|
|
|
12-12
|
Anagha Bhave
Nagpur, India
|
|
I cant believe I'm so popular!!!
|
|
|
|
12-9
|
Ali
Baltimore, MD
|
|
Tom, you're no longer in the book club. Out!
|
|
|
|
12-8
|
Alyson
Atlanta, GA
|
|
Why does she have to be taller than me, Oprah, why?!
|
|
|
|
12-8
|
Barry Moore
New Hope, PA
|
|
Oprah, this is why they cast me as the teradactyl in the Scientology Xmas pagent.
|
|
|
|
12-7
|
Barry Moore
New Hope, PA
|
|
Oprah, this is why they cast me as the teradactyl in the Scientology Xmas pagent.
|
|
|
|
12-7
|
Sharon Lakes
Boca Raton, FL
|
|
This is what happens when pre-written anectodes get too elaborate.
|
|
|
|
12-7
|
Rebecca
Salt Lake City, UT
|
|
And a shrink told me I couldn't fly!
|
|
|
|
12-7
|
Evelyn
Texarkana
|
|
Whose's yo daddy, biotch?
|
|
|
|
12-7
|
Annie
Huber Heights, OH
|
|
This is what a mid-life crisis looks like, Oprah! Whee!
|
|
|
|
12-6
|
Rebecca
Fishkill
|
|
I'm gonna get u Oprah
|
|
|
|
12-6
|
Courtney
Long Island, NY
|
|
FRIGGN' CRAZY!!!
|
|
|
|
12-6
|
Danielle
New York, NY
|
|
What happens when Tom sprinkles on some pixie dust and thinks happy thoughts
|
|
|
|
12-5
|
Meg
Bartlesville
|
|
Wee, this is fun!!!
|
|
|
|
12-5
|
Sammy
Allen Park, MI
|
|
The mother ship is here, Oprah! The mother ship is here!
|
|
|
|
12-5
|
Ricky
Honolulu, HI
|
|
Can't you tell this stupid grin on my face is a cry for security to kick Cruise out!
|
|
|
|
12-5
|
Adrian
Miami, FL
|
|
OMG Oprah just gave me a car!
|
|
|
|
12-5
|
Jill
Denver, CO
|
|
He is still hot
|
|
|
|
12-5
|
Natalie
Redding, CA
|
|
That's right Oprah, just smile and nod.
|
|
|
|
12-2
|
Erica
Mechanicsburg
|
|
Cruise gone crazy
|
|
|
|
12-2
|
Susan O.
Memphis, TN
|
|
I become more of an idiot the older I get!
|
|
|
|
12-2
|
Glenn
Plano, TX
|
|
I bagged me a young one
|
|
|
|
12-2
|
Antonio
Port Saint Lucie, FL
|
|
Katie and I will have a bouncehouse at our wedding reception! Rad!
|
|
|
|
12-1
|
Scottie
Detroit, MI
|
|
"Then the aliens will come down and then you'll know my full power."
|
|
|
|
12-1
|
Stacey
New Jersey
|
|
Insanity is my defense to getting Katie pregnant with my alien baby and I'm sticking to it!
|
|
|
|
12-1
|
Tracy
Los Angeles, CA
|
|
Scientology has turned me into a madman!!!
|
|
|
|
12-1
|
Marc
Coffeyville, KS
|
|
Oprah decides to let Tom Cruise test out the new TempraPedic Coach
|
|
|
|
11-30
|
Alicia Daniels-Austin
Pasadena, CA
|
|
I'll do a back flip for L.Run Hubbard!
|
|
|
|
11-30
|
Erik Sederberg
Valparaiso, IN
|
|
F**k yo' couch, Oprah! F**k yo' couch!
|
|
|
|
11-30
|
Bruce
Carson City, NV
|
|
Do I have to beat this Scientology thing into you too?
|
|
|
|
11-29
|
Yowza
Westchester, NY
|
|
"Must Kill Oprah"
|
|
|
|
11-29
|
Doug B.
White Plains, NY
|
|
It's about maturity, not age.
|
|
|
|
11-29
|
Michelle
Gambrills, MD
|
|
The Kebler Elf doesntt have anything on me!!
|
|
|
|
11-29
|
Lyra Tanner
Redwood City, CA
|
|
Katie taught me to be hyper active and jump on people when I'm happy
|
|
|
|
11-29
|
Candy
Oakland, CA
|
|
Tom Cruise is bananas! B-A-N-A-N-A-S!
|
|
|
|
11-29
|
Branden
Creswell
|
|
But Oprah I want a Pony now!
|
|
|
|
11-29
|
Lusardo
Louisville, KY
|
|
I'm Coo Coo for Coco Puffs!
|
|
|
|
11-28
|
Nikki
Dublin, CA
|
|
Yipppeeee!!! Now everyone will finally believe that I am not gay!!!
|
|
|
|
11-28
|
Doris Day
Carmel, NY
|
|
I'm over compensating because the closet it really lonely
|
|
|
|
11-28
|
Kevin
Fort Worth, TX
|
|
I'm a flaming homosexual!!!
|
|
|
|
11-28
|
Lynne
Riverside
|
|
I can't wait to buy Oprah's 20 seasons DVD
|
|
|
|
11-28
|
Goldie
Fall River
|
|
Whoa, why didn't you tell me Gayle King pissed on this couch before you let me sit down on it?
|
|
|
|
11-28
|
Goldie
Fall River
|
|
Whoa, why didn't you tell me Gayle King pissed on this couch before you let me sit down on it?
|
|
|
|
11-28
|
Wendy
Buffalo, New York
|
|
WOO HOO... I new if I dated someone young enough I'd get a virgin & someone I could brain wash.
|
|
|
|
11-28
|
Skippie
Decatur, GA
|
|
TOM! SIT YOUR STUPID WHITE A** DOWN FOOL. THAT S**T CANT BE THAT GOOD
|
|
|
|
11-23
|
Sharon
Indiana
|
|
I'm an Idiot!
|
|
|
|
11-23
|
Eddie Samperio
San Bernardino, CA
|
|
Staying in the closet is making me nuts!
|
|
|
|
11-23
|
Laura
Milton Keynes
|
|
I do not need Prozak! I do not need Prozak! I do not need Prozak!
|
|
|
|
11-23
|
Jay VanMatre
New Orleans, LA
|
|
If you're crazy and you know it, jump up and down!!!
|
|
|
|
11-22
|
Scott McGuire
Homestead, FL
|
|
Oprah looks on amused as Tom Cruise performs a Scientologist mating dance.
|
|
|
|
11-22
|
Pat Stimson
Wading River, NY
|
|
This is why they make meds in the first place. He should try some
|
|
|
|
11-20
|
Clelia Wurgler
Seville, OH
|
|
Come on!!! Show me the money Oprah.
|
|
|
|
11-20
|
DA
New York City
|
|
Oh my god he's crazy and Oprah is terrified.
|
|
|
|
11-20
|
Vera Moore
Whiteville
|
|
my sperm are alive
|
|
|
|
11-19
|
Jose
Fairfax, VA
|
|
I'm so excited I'm going bananas!
|
|
|
|
11-19
|
Jennifer
Summerville, SC
|
|
And people still like him?
|
|
|
|
11-19
|
RISKA TUCKER
Houston, TX
|
|
LITHIUM ANYONE??
|
|
|
|
11-18
|
Kerry
Phillipsburg, PA
|
|
I REALLY AM HETEROSEXUAL!
|
|
|
|
11-18
|
Angel Miller
Banning, CA
|
|
for some reason even though i've never seen his ears he looks like a person with dirty ears
|
|
|
|
11-18
|
Anierose
Elizabeth, NJ
|
|
Look! I'm reminiscing my audition for "Risky Business."
|
|
|
|
11-18
|
Lyn
Crowley, LA
|
|
"Someone commit me already!!!"
|
|
|
|
11-18
|
Kimber
Baltimore, MD
|
|
Now that the Prozac has worn off, I'm going to have to kill you!
|
|
|
|
11-18
|
Nancy
New York, NY
|
|
Didn't your momma teach you to keep your feet off the furniture??
|
|
|
|
11-18
|
Kate
Kansas City, KS
|
|
OMG, that little monkey is attacking Oprah!
|
|
|
|
11-17
|
Nicole
Washington D.C.
|
|
The aliens have landed.
|
|
|
|
11-17
|
Josh Smyth
New York, NY
|
|
"When Celebs Attack"
|
|
|
|
11-17
|
Cassandra
San Diego, CA
|
|
I'm not a complete lunatic, but I play one on TV!
|
|
|
|
11-17
|
Lori Jones
Trumbull, CT
|
|
I SHOULD'VE GOTTEN THE TOM HANKS PART IN "BIG"!!!
|
|
|
|
11-17
|
Chris Kelso
St Louis
|
|
I need you at that next Scientology meeting, Oprah!
|
|
|
|
11-17
|
Mark Halvarson
Dallas, TX
|
|
Why won't you let me join that damn book club?
|
|
|
|
11-17
|
|
