• Season 4, Ep 8

Farrah Has A Sitdown With Her Mom

Dr. Jenn struggles to help Farrah's mom communicate with her daughter.

02/20/2014 ยท 3:57

>> RIGHT NOW, THIS MOMENT.

>> I'M VERY HAPPY, AND I FEEL

BLESSED TO BE HERE.

I FEEL BLESSED TO BE WITH

MY FAMILY.

>> WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO ME IS

THAT YOU'RE ANGRY.

>> OH, NO, I'M NOT A BIT ANGRY.

>> AND IT'S OKAY, BY THE WAY,

IF YOU ARE.

SOMETIMES THAT COMES UP IN

THERAPY.

>> NO, I'M NOT AN ANGRY PERSON.

>> SO YOU DON'T FEEL ANGER?

>> NOT AT ALL.

I'M THE EXACT OPPOSITE.

>> YOU'VE HIT YOUR DAUGHTER.

HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT YOU--

THAT YOU DON'T EVER FEEL ANGRY?

>> WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'VE HIT

MY DAUGHTER?

>> IT'S DOCUMENTED THAT--

THAT YOU HIT HER.

>> YEAH, WELL, YOU WEREN'T

THERE.

YOU DIDN'T SEE ALL OF IT.

>> BUT, LIKE, THAT WAS ALSO REAL

FIGHTING, MOM.

>> BUT WHEN YOU'VE ASKED

SOMEBODY FOR 25 MINUTES TO QUIT

SCREAMING AND CUSSING AND

SWEARING AT YOU, AND YOU ASK

THEM TO BE CALM, AND THEY JUST

KEEP ESCALATING AND GETTING OUT

OF CONTROL--

>> WHEN I GET TO THE POINT OF

YELLING, SCREAMING, CUSSING...

>> YOU DON'T NEED TO THOUGH.

>> IT'S BECAUSE I'VE GOTTEN TO

THE POINT OF BEING SO

AGGRAVATED.

I'VE LEARNED FROM THAT, BUT I'M

JUST SAYING WHY

THE PHYSICALNESS?

>> WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST BE QUIET

WHEN I ASKED YOU?

>> DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HIT YOU?

DOES IT LOOK LIKE I JUST--

>> WELL, YOU HAVE HIT ME.

>> YEAH, I HAVE HIT YOU. WHY?

>> YOU HAVE HIT ME AND CALLED

THE POLICE ON ME...

>> YES, I HAVE.

>> AND LIED ABOUT IT...

>> I DIDN'T [bleep] LIE ABOUT

IT.

>> AND HAD ME PUT IN JAIL.

>> IF YOU WANT TO--IF YOU WANT

TO GO THERE.

YOU JUST DON'T KNOW HOW TO

CONTROL YOURSELF AND TALK TO

US, AND THAT'S WHY I FEEL

THERE'S A DISCONNECT A LOT,

AND IT'S HURTFUL.

>> YEAH.

WELL, IS THAT MY FAULT?

>> YEAH, IT IS YOUR [bleep]

FAULT!

>> WHY?

>> IT'S A [bleep] FAMILY, AND IF

YOU GUYS THOUGHT THAT FAMILY WAS

SO IMPORTANT, THEN [bleep]

WOULDN'T BE OUT OF CONTROL.

I CAN'T EVEN LOOK AT MY FAMILY

BECAUSE EVERYBODY IS, LIKE,

ANGRY AT EACH OTHER.

>> I'M NOT ANGRY AT ANYBODY.

>> OKAY.

YOU KNOW WHAT?

IF YOU'RE NOT [bleep] ANGRY,

THEN I DON'T KNOW WHY EVERYBODY

JUST HAS SUCH A HARD TIME

GETTING ALONG.

>> I DON'T EITHER.

>> OH, MY [bleep] GOD.

>> YEAH.

>> CAN YOU ADDRESS HER FEELINGS?

>> I AM ADDRESSING IT.

>> [sniffles]

>> TAKE A BREATH.

TAKE A BREATH.

UNDERSTAND THAT IF FARRAH CAN

BETTER UNDERSTAND WHY YOU

REACTED THE WAY YOU DID,

I BELIEVE IT WILL HELP YOUR

RELATIONSHIP.

>> ABSOLUTELY, AND I'VE JUST

TOLD HER WHY I REACTED THE WAY

I DID.

>> BUT I FEEL LIKE YOU'RE NOT

GRASPING HOW PAINFUL THESE

THINGS WERE FOR HER...

>> I AM GRASPING IT.

>> BECAUSE THEY WEREN'T PAINFUL

FOR YOU.

>> NO.

>> THE THING THAT SHE NEEDS FROM

YOU IS SOME EMPATHY.

SHE NEEDS TO BE UNDERSTOOD BY

YOU.

SHE NEEDS FOR YOU TO GET HER.

>> YEAH, WELL, THAT'S WHY I'M

HERE.

I DIDN'T COME 3,000 MILES--

>> THIS ISN'T ABOUT HOW MANY

MILES YOU FLEW--

>> NO, AND YOU CAN TWIST

WHATEVER I SAY.

I AM TRYING TO TELL YOU I AM

DEMONSTRATING TO EVERYBODY HERE,

OKAY?

>> I'M TRYING TO HELP YOU HAVE

EMPATHY FOR FARRAH.

>> I DO FEEL EMPATHY FOR FARRAH.

>> THEN SHOW HER.

THEN SHOW HER.

I'M TRYING TO HELP YOU.

>> I DO FEEL EMPATHY FOR HER,

BUT I WILL NOT TOLERATE SOMEBODY

SITTING HERE AND TELLING ME WHAT

IS NOT RIGHT OR SOMETHING I

DON'T FEEL, OKAY?

>> I'M NOT TELLING YOU WHAT'S

RIGHT OR WHAT'S WRONG, AND I'M

NOT TELLING YOU WHAT YOU FEEL.

>> QUIT JUDGING AND PRESUPPOSING

WHAT IT IS WHEN IT ISN'T.

>> I'M NOT JUDGING.

I SEE YOU STAYING IN YOUR HEAD

AND NOT GOING IN YOUR HEART.

>> NO, MY HEART--

[scoffs]

AND I CAN'T TALK ABOUT THIS

RIGHT NOW, BUT MY HEART IS

BEYOND BROKEN.

I CAN'T GO THERE RIGHT NOW.

AND THERE'S NOBODY, NOBODY,

NOBODY I LOVE MORE THAN

MY DAUGHTER AND MY FAMILY.

I'M TELLING YOU.

AND IF I HAVE ONE FAILING IN

THIS WORLD, IT'S THAT I NEED

PEOPLE TO TELL ME WHAT THEY

THINK, AND I NEED 'EM TO BE

HONEST WITH ME.

I'M NOT GIFTED TO BE ABLE TO

READ HER FACE, READ HER HEART,

BY LOOKING AT HER.