We’re subjected to even more of his threesome at the outset of the episode and it continues to make us as uncomfortable and outraged as Nicki Minaj felt last week.
“You never cease to amaze me,” his pal Benzino tells him. Benzino falls somewhere in between impressed by and concerned for Kirk. “You’re still a married man,” Zino tells him. Kirk defends that “free pass” he claims he had, but Benzino at least seems to understand women, and he can foresee that Rasheeda might not be so accepting of Kirk’s behavior while he had said pass. “I always have room at my crib,” Benzino offers. Kirk might need it.
Finally we get to see how K.Michelle’s hair magic is performed. She’s checking out new looks at the wig store because she’s headlining her own tour and she’s invited Ariane along to help make sure her hair is on point.
Ariane is having fun with the wigs herself, and when K mentions that she’s auditioning backup singers soon, Ariane throws her for a loop by mentioning she’d like to try out.
“You can’t just pop up one day and say you wanna be a singer,” K says. She’s pretty surprised that Ariane has sprung this on her and isn’t sure how seriously to take it. “She better have some tough skin, and the chick better know how to sing. I ain’t playing no games.”
Mimi and Stevie are enjoying a pleasant, drama-free phase in their relationship, but not for long. They meet for lunch and Stevie brings up a recent shopping trip he took Mimi on. “You got the bread, but what did I get?” he asks. “What did you expect?” Mimi wants to know. “You know. What should I want? A little bit of…lettuce.”
“He asked me for some lettuce. HEAD of lettuce,” Mimi says. “REALLY???” Really. Also, is that what the kids are calling it these days?
“You’re serious?” she asks him. He tells her “Didn’t I get you a car?”
“He give me something, he expects me to have sex with him. I’m not f—ing you anymore!” She drops the keys to her new Mercedes back in his hand and tells him “I don’t need you to get me something if you’re gonna hold it over my head.” (Of lettuce?)
Erica was there for Scrappy on the day he turned himself in and went to jail, and for that, Momma Dee is grateful and has a lot of respect. So Scrappy wants the two of them to come together and figure out finances so that Emani is secure.
Erica explains that they had an agreement to take Scrappy off child support as long as he provided cash when it was needed, but since he’s currently in jail with no cash flow, “the agreement is finito.” Momma Dee says she’ll step in to provide for Emani instead, but Erica isn’t on board. “I’ll be damned if I let Momma Dee’s ratchet ass help me in any way, shape or form.” Erica would rather pawn her engagement ring than accept any money from Momma Dee. “Go ’head and pawn the ring and get the hell outta my palace!” Momma says. Oddly enough, Momma Dee goes with Erica when she goes to pawn the ring, and while it seems weird that she goes, it gives us this amazingness where she exclaims “Get this ring off that bitch hannnd! Openopenopenopen!”
Drew goes to Traci’s to apologize for trying to kiss her last week and explains that it wasn’t until he saw her with a new man that he realized he had feelings for her. Isn’t that always how it goes?
To make amends, he asks Traci if he can take her and Sean out to dinner. She thinks that’s crazy talk.
Drew admits that the fact that he has a popcorn ho of the week around his house is a double standard, but he’s willing to give Sean a chance. He has other motives though, although they at least seem somewhat noble — he wants to get to know this new man to see if he can be trusted around their son.
At K.Michelle’s backup singer auditions, it looks like the line for American Idol. So many people have shown up for the open call, but there’s only one person we care about, and when Ariane takes the mic, she apologizes because she’s sick. When she finishes her song, one of K’s fellow judges, Mike, plays the Simon Cowell role and says “She sounds like a cat dying in heat.”
K’s face doesn’t look all that impressed either, but she doesn’t want her judging panel to be so hard on her friend and she tells him to ease up. Ariane might not be one of the best candidates but she wasn’t bad enough to warrant what he was dishing.
Joseline wants that ring but she also wants to take a few more steps towards a full-on life with Stevie. After all, someone needs to cook him that steak. Together they go look at a house together and she points out all the luxuries it has to offer, like heated floors and a giant kitchen table they can have sex on.
“Yo, ma, pump your brakes!” Stevie says. While they straddle each other on the poor homeowner’s bed, he tells her he’s not all the way on board with buying the house and she gives him one pf her better Joseline-isms: “I’m going to be an old lady without no hair, and gray hairs on my p—y before you give me a commitment!”
Amazingly, this works. “I want it,” he tells her. The house, the wedding, the commitment, all of it. “With Mimi acting all crazy,” Stevie says, Joseline may just win Stevie after all.
Bambi’s back! Turns out she’s tight with Traci, so she shows up to an event Traci is hosting and invites Benzino. To complicate things, Benzino invites Kirk, and Bambi invites Mary Jane, the woman Kirk messed with at the cabin. “Dr. Love don’t have an explanation for this, right here,” Benzino says.
They all start to fill Traci in on how very turned up it was at the cabin and Traci, who is friends with Rasheeda and attended her baby shower, if you’ll recall, is like “The hell going on around here?” She doesn’t like what she sees (Kirk flirting freely with Mary Jane, Mary Jane defending Kirk’s “free pass”) and she’s sure Rasheeda wouldn’t like it either, but she and Sean leave so they can leave all this “turned up” business behind.
Momma Dee has called everyone in her kingdom together for a party because, as it turns out, Scrappy’s time in jail was much shorter than anticipated and he’s made it out. Erica is happy, for Emani’s sake, that Scrappy is out of jail, but she has to come clean to him and admit she pawned his ring.
“You pawn TVs, you know what I’m saying? You pawn stuff you know you can get back real quick. The ring though?” Scrappy says. He’s hurt. “I ain’t with that s—t.” He explains that the act of his buying the ring meant he was making his family whole and he couldn’t wait to give it to Erica. Her selling it shows him what an ungrateful person she is. He walks away upset, and Momma Dee starts yelling about how Erica “struck again” and Erica’s mother comes at the queen and her prince, and it becomes an all-out battle between the moms. (“She ain’t the Queen of the South, she’s the Queen of S—t!” Mingnon yells.)
Amid the ruckus, Erica teeters on her heels and falls over, and her Scrappy tries to hold her mom back, but they accuse him of trying to come at her. They leave the party screaming about making sure Scrappy gets sent back to jail, and Scrappy runs off defending himself saying he was just trying to hold her back.
Traci decides it’s up to her to tell Rasheeda what Kirk was up to at her event. She explains that he and Mary Jane were regaling her with their tales of turned-up-ness and Rasheeda responds “That s— makes me sick.”
“Your married ass don’t need to be turned nowhere!”
Rasheeda’s held it together thus far, but this is the last straw for her and she breaks down. “We gonna chop up this business and we he can get the f— steppin’,” she says. And at this moment who should walk out, but the man himself.
When Rasheeda asks him about this lake business he tells her “You said do me, get the f— outta here, don’t come back, do what you wanna do….why would it be a problem?” he asks.
Rasheeda, in tears, tells him “I hate you right now.”
“When I told Kirk ’Do you,’ that meant go out there and figure out exactly what’s going on with yourself. I didn’t give him no free pass to run out here and be a ho.”
She asks him to be straight and tell her exactly what he did at the lake and Kirk, who looks smug and righteous while also realizing his free pass is about to hit him in the ass so hard, says “I was drunk! So…it was some girls there. I was in the Jacuzzi. There were some girls in the bed. So, yeah.” SO YEAH.
When Rasheeda flips out, he maintains this weird sociopathic calm and tells her to relax and has the gall to lock her out of her house when he goes inside to get his things.
“You’re a liar, you’re a g–damn cheat, and I’m tired of your ass,” she says throwing hos clothes on the lawn.
He literally runs away from her while she tells us “My husband can come back when he done riding bikes with Benzino old no-neck ass. Send your raggedy-ass hoes to get the burned up clothes since you wanna turn up. Turn up on that s–t.”