Basketball Wives: Stank Attitudes And Angry Birds

“Little Tami” rears her ugly head this week!

The ladies have left New York and Tami and Evelyn are both in L.A. They get together because they need to discuss all things Tasha, from her weave bar’s “soft” grand opening to the birthday party that the girls ditched after waiting two hours. Tami is shocked to hear that Ev, Shaunie, and Suzie left the party before Tasha even showed up, but remember that Tami had the old “asbestos in the eye” affliction that kept her from coming, so she’s like “So I didn’t miss nothin’ then.”

“You ain’t miss nothin’,” Ev says.

Shaunie is planning a thirteenth birthday party for her son, Shareef, which she has dubbed a “bro mitvah.” It’s going to be huge. 150 kids. A photo booth. And hopefully Big Sean, Wiz Kalifa or Lil’ Wayne. Fire. And girls to walk him down a red carpet as he enters. Typical 13-year-old stuff, you know? (Ed. Note: My 13th birthday party was me and five friends at the Wendy’s Super Bar. We ate Frosties and chili.)

When it’s finally party time, Shareef does indeed walk in on a red carpet, there are multiple wardrobe changes, arcade games and a DJ. Alas, no Big Sean or Wiz Kalifa, though. Shaunie is clearly proud of her son, and she’d do anything for him, it’s a sweet family moment to watch her bro get mitzvah’d.

Tasha gathers all the women together to confront them about why they weren’t at her birthday. “We were at the birthday party,” Shaunie corrects her. We should point out that Tasha has said numerous times that she is a mature woman who handles her shiz directly, and to the point, and she’s no joke. As she enters the restaurant, she barely even says hello, saying “Who wants to start?” Not it?

“We didn’t get the memo to come later, we came on time,” Shaunie explains.

“Well, when it’s somebody’s birthday,” Tasha reasons, no matter how late the birthday girl is, you wait. “Who comes to a birthday party and leaves?”

“I am sorry your feelings were hurt, that was not the intention,” Shaunie says. “But — ”

“There is no ’buts,'” Tasha tells her. “We don’t need to go into the ’but’ part.'”

“But,” Shaunie continues, “you was late.”

Tasha asks Suzie for her excuse and then dismissed her because, as she tells Suzie directly, “You just follow what the other ladies do.”

The reactions in this scene? Priceless:

When Suzie asks Tasha what she thought of the gift they got her, a bag of sex toys, since Stephon lives in China for much of the year, Tasha dismisses that, too. “No. I like a body. A warm body.”

“Well s—, we spent like $300!” Evelyn says. Suzie says she’d be happy to take the toys off Tasha’s hands. Reminder: Suzie’s been celibate for a year! Of course she would.

Since Tami wasn’t able to attend the party, Tasha tells her it would still be nice if she got her a gift. Any time this month is fine, since Tasha celebrates birthday month. This, after she takes a dump all over the gift she did receive from the others. Nope. Not gonna fly with Tami.

The conversation is far from over despite the fact that apologies were offered, because Shaunie wants to know who, at the party, let it leak that they left early and referred to all the women as “angry birds.” If anyone is an angry bird, it’s Tasha, Shaunie says, and goes on to tell Tasha “You should adjust that little stank attitude.” Tasha, still harping on the fact that this is her birthday month, says it’s not over and there’s still plenty of time for all of them to make it up to her.

This whole scene is awkward and uncomfortable, and it doesn’t help that Suzie, who is clearly pissed off at the stuff Tasha said to her, keeps taking digs at her, like saying that the next present they should get Tasha is a watch so she’s not late again. This is a sign of things to come. Terrible things to come.

Tami’s working a lot on herself these days, from more sessions with her life coach to keep “Little Tami” under control. Little Tami being the part of Tami’s self that flies off the handle when she’s provoked.

And Tami’s also promoting a weight-loss product that helped her get into the great shape she’s in. The one drawback of having a great body and endorsing a weight-loss supplement, however, is that sometimes you might have to do photo shoots showing off said body, and that makes Tami uncomfortable. She nervously goes to her shoot, but there’s no need to worry after all, she kills it.

(Check out more photos from her shoot here.)

Tami’s also trying to teach Suzie how to have a more commanding presence, because Suzie feels completely disrespected by Tasha and she wants to gain some power and control in her relationships. If anyone can teach Suzie how to take control, it’s Tami.

“You don’t have to be confrontational, but you still can have a point of view,” Tami tells Suzie.

Suzie plans to confront Tasha, and she says “Stop taking kindness for weakness. Because I may not be that nice person anymore.”

Suzie goes to Tasha’s hotel room to confronther and, just like Tasha, she gets right to business. Except that she kind of just launches a missile instead of easing into things, and she tells Tasha “F— you for acting that way toward me.”

“F— you is a little harsh,” Tasha says.

“Well, f— you,” Suzie says, bringing out her “Little Tami.”

“F— you back,” Tasha responds.

“F— you harder.” Are we in eighth grade here?

Tasha kicks Suzie out of her hotel room but she can’t leave well enough alone and before the elevator can come, she confronts Suzie again and it devolves into a “whose hand is in whose face” situation. Tasha walks away but Suzie chases her and knocks her hat off.

“Put your hands on me again and it’s going to be a major problem,” Tasha tells her. Sounds like Little Tami might have a Little Tasha to contend with.