Nikki Reed Is Shakespeare Reincarnated As She Praises Her Hubby With Intense Instagram Post

To think this post is a tad aggressive or not to think it is?... That is the question.

You know Nikki Reed as an actress, but soon, you may know her as the next great literary pioneer of the century. The Shakespeare prodigy took to Instagram this morning to send her hubs Ian Somerhalder a poetic message for his 37th birthday, and immediately, a star was born. When you have writing skills this profound, a simple “Happy Birthday, babe, I love you! xoxox” might as well be an abomination. Not to mention the rare gift to see auras in “vibrant reds and deep orange hues.” To our knowledge, Shakespeare didn’t also have psychic abilities, and while Nikki is alive and well showcasing her talents, the legend is rolling in his grave.

Here’s the post, that will be replacing Corinthians 13:4-7 (“Love is patient, love is kind”) at weddings ’round the world, starting today:

Beautiful. Just beautiful.

Am I wrong? Did you not enjoy thinking about how alone you are while sipping your daily coffee and getting ambushed with this post? You need to stop being so cynical, friend, and realize that with our hands pressed together, we’ll make it through.

Pizza is bae. And yes, I still say bae.
@taylorferber