Justin Bieber Says He Is “Being Used” by Kourtney Kardashian, but Get Your Mind Out of the Gutter

We think this means something totally different.

The world took a collective seat a few months back when rumors circulated Kourtney Kardashian and Justin Bieber were hooking up. Nothing has been 100 percent confirmed or denied yet, but Sir Bieber said something during a pre-taped The Bert Show interview that will definitely raise some eyebrows.

When faced with a headline detailing his relationship with KourtKourt, Justin jokingly responded, “I’m being used, man. What can I say?” Host Bert Weiss pried further, but the “Sorry” maverick wouldn’t budge. “Nah, we’ll leave it at that,” he said.

Why so coy, Biebs? Did something really happen between you and the Kween? We choose not to jump to some hot-and-heavy conclusion and, instead, offer a different interpretation of Justin’s quote. He could’ve meant many things when he said he is “being used” by Kourt–not just for his ~bOdY.~ Here are a few possibilities. (Full disclosure: These are just the VH1 staff’s guesses, but anything is possible, right?)

  • She needs someone to fetch her tea every morning.

    Embedded from www.instagram.com.

    You don’t expect this goddess to make it herself, do you?

  • She needs his voice on an original song for her app.

    Embedded from www.youtube.com.

    Her only requirement: It beats Kim’s song “Jam.”

  • She uses him to make sure her jacket doesn’t fall off.

    Embedded from www.instagram.com.

    Edgy fashion, people. Don’t try to understand it.

  • She needs someone to play pool with, and Justin is avail AF.

    Embedded from www.instagram.com.

    Game pals/gals.

  • She needs help arranging oranges–and other fruit–in various bowls.

    Embedded from www.instagram.com.

    So healthy.

  • Someone has to put on her waist trainer every day, and Justin is probably game.

    Embedded from www.instagram.com.

    He loves waists. And training.

  • Kourtney has been tasked with preventing aliens from entering Earth. Justin has muscles and can help her.

    Embedded from www.instagram.com.

    The human race is at stake, bbs.

In conclusion: Kourtney and Justin may have hooked up. They also could be battling martians right now. Until Justin says more than he is “being used,” let’s just leave well enough alone, shall we?