By Danielle Kent and Chris Rosa
No one raises their eyebrows at overt sexuality in pop music these days. However, when the lyrics come from underage artists, that’s a different story. There is something fundamentally creepy about a 16-year-old singing about getting freaky in a backseat, but it happens more often than you think–as these eight examples demonstrate.
Sex! Smoking! Staying up “all night”! Who let these children sing about such debauchery? We need to call their parents immediately. This is getting out of control.
Chris Brown, “Gimme That” (2005)
Breezy was only 16 when he put out “Gimme That,” which details his desire to get with an older lady–in other words, statutory rape. “I know you like it how I lean in the ’lac/You could be in the back saying (gimme, gimme, gimme)” Brown sings on the track. He continues, “I can picture us switching lanes in the coupe/With you on the phone screaming my name.” Fornication! He’s talking about fornication! Someone take this KID’s car away from him before sh-t gets illegal.
Willow Smith, “5” (2014)
Smith has adopted her brother Jaden’s eclectic writing style with lyrics like, “You’ve got the touch baby ’cause you’re the one/I can taste the smoke rollin’ off your lips” in her song “5.” And by eclectic, we mean straight-up inappropriate. Smith is currently 15, and this song is two years old. Why was she talking about smoking when she didn’t even have a learner’s permit?
New Boyz, “Tie Me Down” (2009)
New Boyz came on the scene during the jerking craze with their song “You’re a Jerk,” but the lyrics in their song “Tie Me Down” are what really caught our ears. The two rappers make it known that they’re underage (“Sh-t, I’m only 17!”), but that doesn’t stop them from including lines like, “Yeah you cute, so what?/ let’s get it through your head/Yeah, we make love, sex, weed all in the bed.” Sex? Weed? THE BED?! You have the SATs tomorrow! Put the drugs down!
Albert, “Booty Pop” (2012)
This is genuinely disturbing. Why someone thought it was a good idea for a 6-year-old to rap “I can make your booty pop!” with half-naked grown ass women dancing around him is a mystery. But it’s something that should have never happened…under any circumstances. Where is Jesus?
Usher, “Can U Get Wit It,” (1994)
Usher released his self-titled debut album in 1994 when he was just 16. Though this album didn’t gain much critical acclaim, we listened and found some especially freaky lyrics for such a young man. In “Can U Get Wit It,” Usher describes his ideal relationship: “I don’t have much money, I can’t buy a diamond ring/I’m not tryin’ to be funny, but it’s only a sexual thing/Can u get wit it?/It’s like that/It’s only a sexual thing.” “Sexual” things are for adults, Usher. You’re a minor. Get back to class.
Miley Cyrus, “Can’t Be Tamed” (2010)
At 17 Cyrus crooned, “I go through guys like money flying out the hands” on this stomping electro-pop smash. But at 17, the only thing “flying out your hands” should be flashcards for your biology test.
Britney Spears, “…Baby One More Time” (1998)
Spears released her claim-to-fame at the tender age of 16, and it included these saucy lyrics: “Show me how you want it to be/Tell me, baby/’Cause I need to know now.” The submissive Lolita innuendo of these words is so wrong, we’re contemplating calling Child Protective Services immediately.
Harry Styles, “Up All Night” (2011)
Styles was 17 when he sang this song with his One Direction lads. “DJ got the floor to shake, the floor to shake/I wanna stay up all night” he sings. Um, excuse us? Styles is a minor. How is he getting into clubs? Also, “up all night”? You’re in high school, dude. First period is at 8 AM.
JoJo, “The Way You Do Me” (2006)
JoJo was 16 when she released this track, chock-full of suggestive lyrics like, “Boy the way you do me/Why you gotta be so good when you give it to me?/I’ve been trying to think of ways to tell you no/Same time I’ve been thinking I’d be crazy to let it go.” Keep in mind that Swizz Beatz, the writer of this song, is 10+ years JoJo’s senior. What is this “doing” JoJo speaks of? Whatever it is, it’s not right for someone who just got her driver’s license.