Did You Just Have Sex or Watch the Trailer for Michael B. Jordan's New Movie?

Magic Mike XXL comes out today but you no longer care. "But I've been waiting for this for two years, one month and one day," you might say. Nah. Michael B. Jordan just swooped in and changed everything you thought you knew about beautiful, buff men, and ourselves. He plays a boxer in the upcoming film Creed, and this trailer is about to change your life and - I never thought I'd say this - make you think, "Channing, who?" It's serious.

Oh, hey, hi there never-ending ripple of bulging muscles.

Hi, boxing glove that I wish I was rn.

His swoll AF muscles even shimmer in the darkness because they cannot be tamed.

Yas, show that thing who's boss, MBJ.

Is it hot in here, or is it that smoldering stare burning into my soul?

If this movie was two hours of him on the treadmill, I'd happily watch.

~Sweat~

Here are the muscles again, suffocating you with their unruly beauty.

You know bae will need a massage after the big fight.

And you're gonna be the one who gives it to him.

And the best part:

*Actually the best part:

Told you this was sex.

You can run, but you can't hide from your sexiness, MBJ.

It's too late.

You should probably go tell your S.O. you cheated on them now. It's the right thing to do.