How Lil’ Kim + “Big Momma Thang” Helped Many Gay Men Get Through Puberty

Lil’ Kim and fellatio forever, y’all.

-by Michael Arceneaux

Lil’ Kim is many things. She is an incredible rapper. She is a pioneer. She is a legend. She is a visionary. She is an amazing colored wig collector. She is the proud owner of a rabid core group of fans who will threaten to slaughter you on social media (true story). She is an inspiration to many of your favorite female rappers of today. Insert your shade here. There’s plenty to go around.

Of the many honors Kimberly Jones has earned, my favorite would be her place as one of the most sexually liberated recording artists in history. Kim’s catalog is full of sexually explicit content, but arguably her best is “Big Momma Thang” from her debut album, Hardcore.

The song, which will turn 20 next year along with the rest of the album, kicks off its first with the declaration, “I used to be scared of the dick, now I throw lips to the shit.”

I was 12 when this song came out, and I remember having to secure the album by way of Columbia House’s mail-order music club. For those of you too young to remember what the hell a CD player is, back in my day, we typically had to leave our homes, go to a magical place called a record store and purchase an album in physical form. However, some hating ass folks – let’s call them parents, in this instance – didn’t want their children buying “adult material.” So, scheming kids such as myself got around that by way of the aforementioned mail-order music club.

I had already obsessed over the now infamous Hardcore promo poster which featured Lil’ Kim spread-eagle in a pose a friend of mine branded “THE THOT WAR POSE.” We both mean this as a compliment, by the way. That poster piqued my interest, but some of that was forced. Lil’ Kim was the talk of every damn man around me, regardless of age, and much of my thoughts were centered on being jealous of not being invited to dance with Kim on the escalator in the “No Time” video as opposed to what filled out her leopard bikini.

So when Hardcore arrived and “Big Momma Thang” came on, I was both enticed and mortified. Her boldness was intriguing, but her line about being afraid of the dick hit a little too close to home. As my hormones started to speed up, so did the reality that my math was essentially one plus one equal homosexual. Once I became older (or age appropriate to listen, blah, blah), my appreciation for the line, the song, and what Kim has rapped about in her career intensified.

There’s a reason why Kim will always have a strong gay sect in her fan base. The first time I stepped into a gay club – in New York City at a place called Luke and Leroys (R.I.P.) – “Big Momma Thang” played and the entire room recited the song line for line. It has been that way wherever I’ve gone since then. That line, and many more from Kim’s catalog, have helped many a gay forge their sexual identity. Kim was assertive about her sexuality in a way that was typically not welcomed. Not exactly Tia and Tamera Mowry in terms of equal struggle, but close enough (i.e. Tia and Tahj Mowry).

Literally, “I used to be scared of the dick, now I throw lips to the shit,” is the gay man’s struggle in perfect conciseness. Thank you, Kimberly, for indirectly letting many a same sex loving man know that there is no need to fear oral sex. Consider this a birthday card and declaration of appreciation.

I still listen to “Big Momma Thang” regularly. For the record, the remix in which she disses Faith Evans (love you, though) and 2 Pac (enjoy heaven…or Cuba, whatever) is the better version. Lil’ Kim and fellatio forever, y’all.