Please STFU and Watch Tiffany "New York" Pollard Teach Us How to 'Really' Put On Makeup with the Fenty Holiday Gift Guide

Move over women of the Home Shopping Network and YouTube beauty bloggers! There's a new HBIC in town, and she is coming for your jobs.

Rihanna felt like playing Santa Claus and gave us an incredible gift this year: Tiffany "New York" Pollard in a Fenty Beauty Gift Guide that is truly the gift that keeps on giving.

You may have seen these beauty hauls on YouTube before, but this is unlike any other. First of all, any YouTube video that starts with, "It's holiday time, y'all! Listen, we about to bring in the new year and we are not accepting no greasy, no ashy, nor no ugly bitches!" has my attention, okay?

The tutorial is, to put it lightly, a f-cking work of art. It's nine minutes and 52 seconds of pure, New York, bliss.

Somebody hire Tiffany to do all of the marketing for every product in the world from now on. I would watch a whole show of just New York telling me what I should and shouldn't buy. She is truly the Queen of Marketing. This might sound hyperbolic, but I promise that I am not kidding.

She shows us that there are many uses for a Fenty Stunna Lip Paint.

And proves it by...demonstrating its long lasting staying power.

And even gives a shout out to Pumkin! We love a benevolent Queen who gives the audience what they want!

You can watch the whole, glorious thing here:

Thank you, RiRi for making this happen!