You look the best you’ve ever looked, you immediately make eye contact with the hottest person in the room, and you’re somehow not sweaty by the end of the night. Is this a dream or are you in a music video about clubbing? (Answer: the latter.)
That’s not to say you don’t look hot in the real life club — you def do. But by the end of the night, aren’t you either (1) puking, (2) settling for a stranger you’d generously dub a 6, or (3) sweating what’s equivalent to the number of shots you took? Whatever though, right? These are just music videos. Not real life!
But seriously. Here’s what music videos get wrong about clubbing.
You leave your S.O. at home without a fight.
There’s no way you’re leaving your significant other at home for a night without an argument about it.
“Jumpin’, Jumpin'” by Destiny’s Child
The inside of your transportation looks like this.
More like you’re on the train next to a homeless person.
“Lollipop” featuring Static by Lil Wayne
You and your friends bypass the waiting line like this.
Instead, you’re freezing outside and you have to pay a cover.
“Music” by Madonna
You’re this coordinated when you drunkenly get up on the stage to dance.
But you own it anyway.
“Yeah!” featuring Lil Jon & Ludacris by Usher
You take off a stranger’s clothes without getting slapped and/or kicked out.
“Hot In Herre” by Nelly
It’s actually a Tuesday.
F that. You have to get up early tomorrow morning.
“Tuesday” featuring Drake by ILoveMakonnen
Your butt manages to stay inside your freakum dress all night.
Unbeknownst to you, it’s been out to play since shot number four.
“Freakum Dress” by Beyonce
You and your friends look like this dancing.
It’s k, though, ’cause you actually look like that with beer goggles on.
“I’m Out” featuring Nicki Minaj by Ciara
You can afford bottle service.
Does anyone else in here have to pay rent or… ?
“Champagne Showers” featuring Natalia Kills by LMFAO
You find love.
At least not in this hopeless place.
“Love In This Club” by Usher