When it comes to conveying sexual innuendo, our favorite modern day artists sure have a knack for thinking outside the box. Pun intended. Singers like Justin Timberlake, Nicki Minaj and Mariah Carey have made the least sexy scenarios imaginable ooze sex. And until Miley Cyrus experienced her sexual awakening, our naive souls actual thought a wrecking ball was just used for construction work. How wrong we were…
Some sexual music video scenes are blatantly obvious. We get it, Benny Benassi, you want girls to work your heavy machinery. Others, though are completely random. Sorry, JT and Timbaland, some of us would like our shake and fries without a side of sexual rendezvous. Check out these 15 music videos that made everyday activities seem way more exciting than they should be.
Video: “These Boots Are Made for Walkin’” by Jessica Simpson
Activity: Washing a car
Because who doesn’t do a strip tease in a tiny, pink, ruffly bikini when they wash their car? Sponges and towels can totally be replaced by boobs and butts.
Video: “Wrecking Ball” by Miley Cyrus
Activity: Using a wrecking ball for destruction a wall
After almost a year since this video has been released, we’re finally starting to believe our eyes in that this actually happened. If construction workers were only that lucky…
Video: “Blow” by Beyonce
Activity: Roller skating
Dancing sexually in short shorts to a song about “turning that cherry out” make an innocent activity like roller skating not so suitable for children.
Video: “Heartbreaker” by Mariah Carey
Activity: Going to the movies
With Mimi and her crew dancing on the concession countertops, who would actually go in to watch a movie?
Video: “Satisfaction” by Benny Benassi
Activity: Working machinery
This video encompasses very Home Depot employee’s dream. And then some.
Video: “The Boys” by Nicki Minaj and Cassie
Activity: Getting your hair done
Getting a haircut used to suck, until we realized the possibility of hairdressers wearing brassieres on the job.
Video: “Liquorice” by Azealia Banks
Activity: Eating harmless summer treats like hot dogs and popsicles
Call us crazy, but we would skip playing with phallic foods like hot dogs and popsicles in and around our mouths to just eat them. What? That’s a waste of perfectly good snacks.
Video: “Baby One More Time” by Britney Spears
Activity: Going to class
Catholic school girl gone somewhat stripper. Oh no she didn’t! If this happened in the hallways of our high school, we would’ve never skipped class.
Video: “Play” by David Banner
Activity: Working out
No one needs to see us when we’re working out. Seriously, no one. We highly doubt our sweaty, smelly and out of breath selves would translate to be this sexy on screen.
Video: “Carry Out” by Justin Timberlake and Timbaland
Activity: Getting take out
We just want our burgers and fries to go, without having to give a lap dance on the way. Is that so hard to ask?
Video: “Call Me Maybe” by Carly Rae Jepsen
Activity: Mowing a lawn
Mowing the lawn is all about technique. If you’re not doing it without a shirt and in slow motion, you’re not doing it right.
Video: “Milkshake” by Kelis
Activity: Drinking a milkshake
Would you let your kids have a milkshake after watching this video? If not, can’t say we completely blame you.
Video: “Bound 2” by Kanye West
Activity: Riding a motorcycle
Riding a motorcycle and concentrating on the road is hard enough as it is. Adding sex into the mix just seems way too complicated. Seriously, not even Kanye has the concentration to pull that off.
Video: “Call On Me” by Eric Prydz
Activity: Taking part in a group exercise class
Because there is no exercise move like the gyrating pelvic thrust in a thong. And you thought SoulCycle was all the rage…
Video: “Want U Back” by Cher Lloyd
Activity: Getting a bite to eat at the local diner
If we saw this in real life it might actually make us mad. Can’t we relax and enjoy our food without Cher Lloyd dancing on the tables?
[Photo Credit: RCA Records]