Classic Rock Kama Sutra: 18 Songs That Taught Us Everything We Needed To Know About Sex

Turn up the music.

Sex. Rock n’ roll bands have been singing about it since the beginning, when the term “rocking and rolling” was an actual euphemism for the act of, in Shakespeare’s words, “making the beast with two backs.” There’s no shortage of classic rock songs specifically about having sex, from Led Zeppelin’s “Whole Lotta Love” to AC/DC’s “You Shook Me All Night Long” (actually there are very few Led Zeppelin or AC/DC songs that aren’t specifically about having sex). Without getting too graphic however, there are many different ways one can have sex besides the good old fashioned way we all know and love. Rock n’ roll being an innately rebellious form of musical expression has never shied away from talking about these…alternate means of getting one’s rocks off, as The Rolling Stones might say. And fans have thrilled for years to the more risqué songs in the classic rock canon. One might even say they’re educational as the usual discussion of “The birds and the bees” seldom covers the same sexual ground as your average Kiss or Lou Reed song, if you know what I’m saying. In order to make things easy for you, we’ve broken them down into different erotic topics so check out 18 classic rock anthems that taught us there was more than one way to have fun in the bedroom.

  1. Led Zeppelin “Candy Store Rock”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    Oh baby, baby, sugar sister on a silver plate Oh baby, baby, I need a mouthful and I just can’t wait Oh baby, baby, see the shaking in my hand Oh baby, baby, don’t mean to fumble but it tastes so grand Tastes so grand, tastes so grand, baby it’s alright

  2. Motley Crue “She Goes Down”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    Sassy little lassie Walking right past me Down in Tennessee Always a lady I love Southern ladies They just know how to please It’s like connecting the dots Start at the bottom, lick it to the top

  3. AC/DC “Go Down”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    Mary, Mary you’re the one for me And the way you hum Sting me like a bumble bee I’ll be round to see you ’bout ‘Bout half past ten Ain’t felt this good Since I don’t know when You got the touch that I need so much In your finger tips I got the honey that ya love to taste On those lovely lips

  4. Kiss “Nothin’ To Lose”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    Before I had a baby I didn’t care anyway I thought about the back door I didn’t know what to say But once I got a baby I tried every way She didn’t want to do it But she did anyway

  5. Deep Purple “Knockin’ At Your Back Door”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    Sweet Nancy was so fancy To get into her pants We had to be the aristocracy The members that she toyed with At her city club Were something in diplomacy So we put her on the hit list Of a common cunning linguist A master of many tongues And now she eases gently From her Austin to her Bentley Suddenly she feels so young

  6. The Doors “Back Door Man”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    You men eat your dinner Eat your pork and beans I eat more chicken any man ever seen, yeah, yeah I’m a back door man The men don’t know But the little girl understand

  7. The Kinks “Lola”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    Well I’m not the world’s most physical guy But when she squeezed me tight she nearly broke my spine Oh my Lola la-la-la-la Lola Well I’m not dumb but I can’t understand Why she walked like a woman and talked like a man Oh my Lola la-la-la-la Lola la-la-la-la Lola

  8. Lou Reed “Walk On The Wilde Side”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    Holly came from Miami, F.L.A. Hitch-hiked her way across the U.S.A. Plucked her eyebrows on the way Shaved her legs and then he was a she She says, “Hey, babe, Take a walk on the wild side

  9. The Who “I’m A Boy”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    My name is Bill, and I’m a head case They practice making up on my face Yeah, I feel lucky if I get trousers to wear Spend evenings taking hairpins from my hair

  10. Alice Cooper “Muscle of Love”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    I read Dad’s books like I did before, Now things are crystal clear. Lock the door in the bathroom now, I just can’t get caught in here.

  11. Billy Squier “The Stroke”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    Don’t take no rhythm, Don’t take no style Gotta thirst for killin’, Grab your vial and… Put your right hand out, give a firm handshake Talk to me about that one big break

  12. Led Zeppelin “The Lemon Song”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    Squeeze me baby, till the juice runs down my leg The way you squeeze my lemon, I’m gonna fall right out of bed

  13. The Rolling Stones “Stray Cat Blues”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    You say you got a friend, that she’s wilder than you Why don’t you bring her upstairs If she’s so wild then she can join in too It’s no hanging matter It’s no capital crime

  14. Steely Dan “Babylon Sisters”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    We’ll jog with show folk on the sand Drink kirschwasser from a shell San Francisco Show and Tell Well I should know by now that it’s just a spasm Like a Sunday in T.J. That it’s cheap but it’s not free That I’m not what I used to be And that love’s not a game for three

  15. Grand Funk Railroad “We’re An American Band”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    Four young chiquitas in Omaha Waitin’ for the band to return from the show Feelin’ good, feelin’ right, it’s Saturday night The hotel detective, he was outta sight Now these fine ladies, they had a plan They was out to meet the boys in the band They said, “Come on dudes, let’s get it on” And we proceeded to tear that hotel down

  16. Kiss “Sweet Pain”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    My leathers fit tight around me My whip is always beside me You want the same thing every day I’ll teach you love a different way You’ll learn to love me and my sweet pain

  17. The Velvet Underground “Venus In Furs”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    Kiss the boot of shiny, shiny leather Shiny leather in the dark Tongue of thongs, the belt that does await you Strike, dear mistress, and cure his heart

  18. Van Halen “House Of Pain”

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    Most Revealing Lyric:

    Say you’re gonna leave me ‘Cause I only tie you up I always loved you tender But you only like it rough Woman bound for glory Why you’re leavin’ me again? Gonna pack your bags And leave this house of pain