(Nikki)My brother Omar passed awayabout a year ago
from a drug overdose,
and it's been really, really,really hard on my family,
especially my mom.
She really lovedmy brother a lot.
Nobody deserves that painthat she's feeling right now.
This is the first birthdaythat I'm going to...
be having without him.
No one can everunderstand the pain.
I miss him a lot.
The moment I lost him,my life...
I felt dead.(sniffles)
And he alwaysmade me a promise:
"Mom, I'll neverleave you.
I'll never leave you."
Even the house,everything just doesn't
feel the same,coming here.
I don't like to evencome here anymore.
Like, I feeluncomfortable here.
For me, I can't evenwalk in his bedroom.
I still thinkhe's coming home.
Omar was a very important partof our family.
Not only was he my only brotherand my family's only son,
but we worked togetherhand-in-hand
with the family business.
After my brother's loss,I've stepped in and really tried
to help my familywith all their business
and whatever it isthey need help with.
It's definitely alot to handle,
but I don't mind,because family comes first.
In order for me to reallytry to live just a normal...
Peaceful.Peaceful,a little bit, life,
I need to be out of here.
You know, I'm,like, the strong oneout of all of us,
and I know I haveto really step up
and help you nowwith business and everything
'cause you-- you need me.
Life is not justabout business, Nikki.
I would like to see youalso meet a good man.
I don't likebeing by myself.
I want someone I couldtalk to and be there for me,
but I haven't had the bestrelationships.
I think that I've beenusing work as a distraction
to cope what I've beengoing through,
maybe that's whyI've been dating around,
playing the fieldwith Rosa and Safaree.