Who Is the Queen of Reality TV? These Iconic One-Liners Will Help You Decide!

The shade! The read! The life!

VH1’s search for the ultimate Reality TV Queen is getting interesting, people! Kim Kardashian slays the poll with 30 percent of the total votes, but she better watch her back. Joseline Hernandez is gaining momentum with 13 percent, and right behind her is Tiffany “New York” Pollard with an impressive 11 percent. It’s about to be a—what?!—(reality TV) girl fight! See what we did there?

Sadly, The Hills ladies aren’t getting any love. Both Kristin Cavallari and Heidi Montag trail behind with 2 percent. It’ll take major stan-power to put these two back in the race. Does Lauren Conrad need to tweet out an endorsement? *Calling her rn.*

But it’s still anybody’s game. The poll closes Thursday, August 27 at 8 p.m., so DM your friends and tell them it’s time to assemble for their faves. Bragging rights are at stake.

Stumped on who to give your vote? Maybe these fab AF one-liners from our contestants will help you decide. Whether your poison is shading, reading, or deadpan sarcasm, our girls will keep you quenched—so let’s take a drink.

Watch one of our finalists Tamar Braxton explain how to keep it classy on reality TV.

Check out more from VH1’s month-long Keepin’ It Real reality TV package.

  • Kim Kardashian

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    She really should put it on a bumper sticker at this point.

  • NeNe Leakes

    Don’t come for NeNe’s finances, y’all.

  • Heidi Montag

    After going under the knife for 10 plastic surgery procedures in 2010, a swollen but flaw-free Heidi visited her mom Darlene in Colorado and asked this now-legendary question. #Done.

  • Kris Jenner

    What do you do when one of your daughters won’t stop snapping pictures of herself in the car en route to take your other daughter to jail? Ask them nicely, of course.

  • Bethenny Frankel

    When Kelly Killoren Bensimon, alumna of the shit-talking Real Housewives of New York City, acted cray cray during a trip to St. John in Season 3, Bethenny checked her in the most Bethenny way possible. A battle cry was born. Related: “Go to sleep. GO TO SLEEP!”

  • Tamar Braxton

    This is just one of Tamar’s many euphemisms. If this doesn’t work, please see “Have several seats” or referring to yourself in the third person.

  • Angela “Big Ang” Raiola

    This nonsensical noise refers to Big Ang’s several cosmetic procedures. She owns the hell out of them, and we love her for it.

  • Tami Roman

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    “It wasn’t not funny!” Tami didn’t think her housemate David Edwards’ antics on The Real World: Los Angeles (1993) were particularly amusing. She tried to vocalize that but used one too many negatives. An important historical moment.

  • Joseline Hernandez

    When asked what she thought about Mimi Faust’s boob job during the Love & Hip Hop Atlanta Season 2 reunion, Joseline gave this not-so-friendly response. Reading goddess.

  • Tiffany “New York” Pollard

    VH1

    As if you needed a reminder that New York runs this shizz. Honorable mentions: “New York in the motherf—king house” and “You hatin’-ass bitch.”

  • Kristin Cavallari

    Audrina Patridge never saw this coming, and neither did we. We’re thankful it happened.

  • Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi

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    “Let’s just get wastey pants!” Snooki’s casual suggestion is actually the solution to the world’s problems.

It’s time to get crackin’, bbs. Cast your pick for the one true Reality TV Queen below, and spread the word. This is more crucial than electing the next president, tbh.