Alright, friends, are you ready for the Saturday debate to end all Saturday debates? No, we’re not talking about if facepalm quote king Donald Trump will make a good president (LOL) or whether global warming exists. This is something much more important to the flow of society. A vital choice that we must make as humans.
Who is the hotter brother: Chris or Liam Hemsworth?
Typically, picking the sexier sibling is an easy game. But Chris and Liam will leave you mindf—ked. One minute, Liam’s Hunger Games sweat makes your pants drop. The next, Chris’ Thor biceps leave you in a pregnant daze. How can that much fire exist in one family?
Our staff is split down the middle on this one. We need to reach a verdict, and that’s where you come in. Below, we’ve laid out solid arguments for each brother. Read carefully, weigh your options, and vote in the poll below. This isn’t going to be easy.
Chris: He’s a total man on film—like, the type who chops down trees for fun and eats nails. That romance-novel brand of bubbling masculinity is both alluring and terrifying. Just look at him as the powerful (and well-endowed) Thor. He’s basically growling. And we’re all in for it.
Liam: He doesn’t capture the same bang-on-your-chest hotness as his brother. But, make no mistake, homeboy is still a dime. Liam opts for the sweet-sexy route, as evidenced in his 2010 film The Last Song with Miley Cyrus. You still want to rip his shirt off—more on that later—but you’re confident he’ll know what fork to use at dinner. (Thor, er, Chris would just use his hands, probably.)
Round 2: Hair
Chris: The eldest Hemsworth likes to switch up his ’do—he’s even rocked a ponytail—but this Jesus style is his bread and butter. It gives us distinct naughty caveman vibes, which parallels his macho prowess. Someone give him some wood to chop.
Liam: He’s also grown out his hair before, but most associate Liam with the shorter, clean-cut look. Traditional, safe, and stable. Anyone who stans for military dudes probably finds this irresistible.
Chris: Both of these dudes are ripped AF, so the distinction lies in details. Again, we pair Chris’ body with Gaston-level muscularity. He’s strong, confident, and can save you from a burning building without breaking a GD sweat. *Torches apartment.*
Walt Disney Pictures
Liam: His muscles are more accessible—the everyman after a few dumbbell curls. There’s a smoothness to Liam’s bod that feels both comfortable and sturdy. Chris is the one you want when your house burns down, but Liam’s good to carry your television upstairs.
Round 4: Personality
Go home, Hemsworth brothers. Both of them are funny, charming, and give off sparkly sunshine during every interview they do. This one is a draw, but check out these two A+ interviews as references.