Why Isn’t Ryan Reynolds’s Penis More Famous?

I'm talking Ray J status.

Lately, we’ve seen official DILF Ryan Reynolds at work. Or should I say, hard at work.

Your fave Canuck has been on the road promoting two things that could make or break your Valentine’s Day: his new movie, Deadpool and his penis. If you weren’t planning on seeing the latest Marvel flick when it opens on V-Day, you might want to change your plans now because this sexy samurai has a fight scene in the nude.

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Yup.

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In an interview with EW Radio, the actor said the best way to shoot the scene was to “just do it.” I’d say. He explained that since his character is covered in scars, he and his manhood endured “eight hours of prosthetic makeup in places that no man needs to be there with a paintbrush.” He also says Oscar-winning makeup artist Bill Corso did a bril job at making his “penis look perfect,” but I have a feeling he didn’t have to do much work in that aspect. Not much at all.

If you recall, this isn’t the first time Ryan has teased us talking about his off-screen weapon. Last year, he told Conan O’Brien he took a dick pic when he was 18 as a prank in the middle of dinner. When speaking to sexts, he said: “I can’t think of anything more threatening to send a woman than a picture of a penis.” Threatening, eh???

Not to mention, his penis helped create his and Blake Lively’s perfect, mysterious spawn.

And this all brings us back to the original question: Why isn’t Ryan’s penis more famous?

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A real brain buster, indeed. But if his penis isn’t named a national monument by next Valentine’s Day, we got problems.

Pizza is bae. And yes, I still say bae.
@taylorferber