Unlucky ’13: 10 Celebrities Who Had The Worst Year Ever

Thirteen is definitely an unlucky number for more than a few famous folks. Some of the biggest and brightest celebs in Hollywood took major tumbles in this last year, with scandals, flops, and sometimes literal tumbles knocking ’em down a peg or two. 2013 was brutal for many, but read on to see our picks for who had the worst year ever!

10. Lady Gaga

[Photo: Splash News Images]

It’s safe to say that 2013 wasn’t one of Mother Monster’s finer times. She ushered in the new year by flashing her butt onstage after her latex pants split, but that was just a taster for an even bigger performance fiasco a few weeks later in Montreal. Gaga injured herself during a dance move, resulting in a labral tear and broken hip. The remainder of her Born This Way Ball was cancelled, and she spent the better part of the spring with “quarter-sized holes” in her legs and confined to a wheelchair. It was a gold-plated wheelchair that she nicknamed “Emma”, but still. Thankfully she he was back in action by the fall in order to unveil her latest full-legnth, ARTPOP. The record got off to a decent start, but it took an epic 82% second-week sales dip, the third biggest in SoundScan history.

 

9. Blair Underwood

[Photo: NBC]

Oof, poor Ironsides. Not only was the former ER heartthrob’s high-profile return to the small screen cut short after a paltry 3 episodes, but the producers also caught some serious flack for not hiring an actual disabled person.

8. Johnny Depp

[Photo: Disney] 

The silver screen hero celebrated his 50th birthday this year, but he got a pretty lame gift: The third biggest box office bomb of all time! Depp’s passion project, a reboot of the television classic The Lone Ranger, reportedly lost almost $190 million for Disney this summer. Making matters worse, Johnny’s portrayal of Tonto was seen as racist and offensive to Native Americans.

 

7. Justin Bieber

[Photo: Twitter]

The Biebs had a difficult year, with an exhausting touring schedule, errant SNL microphone injury, a fainting spell, and brutal breakup with girlfriend Selena Gomez adding to the many pressures weighing on his teenage superstar shoulders.This might help explain why he pulled an Alec Baldwin (see #6) and snapped at a London photographer back in March. During a scuffle while getting to his SUV, the singer made some degree of (possibly aggressive) physical contact with the photog. Claiming that he had been assaulted, the camera man said something along the lines of “f–k off back to America…f–king little moron.” This made Bieber come out swinging, threatening to “f—ing beat the f–k” out of him. In the end, Bieber’s own body guard had to physically restrain him from laying the smackdown on the paparazzo. Making matters worse, the whole ugly incident was captured on video. He apologized to his fans via Twitter, but less than a month later he was in trouble yet again for spitting on a neighbor. Then there was the Anne Frank misunderstanding, the lawsuit accusing him of plagiarizing his 2010 hit “Somebody To Love”, the time he accidentally offended most of Argentina by kicking their flag across the stage, and (of course) getting caught sneaking a hooker out of a brothel in Brazil…among other things. But on the other hand, we all did dumb things as kids. It’s just that most of us didn’t have paparazzi following our every move while we were young and goofy.

6. Alec Baldwin

[Photo: Splash News Images]

To be honest, we can’t count the number of times Baldwin lost it on the paparazzi. In the summer of 2012 he famously went nuts on a hapless photographer waiting outside the New York Marriage License Bureau,  accusing him of being ” a little girl” and “raped by a priest or something.” Harsh words, but it’s nothing compared to his recent outburst, in which he was videotaped screaming a homophobic epithet at a cameraman waiting outside his Manhattan apartment. It sure sounded like he called the man a “c–ksucking f—-t,” but Baldwin maintains that the second half of the phrase was “fathead.” In any event, despite his apologies for using the first part of the slur, MSNBC cancelled his show in the wake of the scandal.

 

5. Alexander Rodriguez

[Photo: Getty Images]

2013 was the year that A-Rod went the way of Lance Armstrong…almost. The Yankee champ was nearly banned from the MLB for life after getting caught using performance enhancing drugs in the Biogenesis Baseball scandal. Luckily (sort of) for him, he was only suspended from August 8th of this year through to the end of the 2014 season. This whopping 211 game ban -the longest non-lifetime ban in history- is punishment for “use and possession of numerous forms of prohibited performance-enhancing substances,” and “for attempting to cover-up his violations of the Program by engaging in a course of conduct intended to obstruct and frustrate the Office of the Commissioner’s investigation.” Reportedly, he plans to appeal.

4. The Guidices

[Photo: Getty Images]

These stars of Real Housewives of New Jersey made their state proud when they were indicted in July on an incredible 39 charges ranging from conspiring to commit mail and wire fraud, to bank and bankruptcy fraud and making false statements on loan applications. We’re not totally set with the legal jargon, but we do know that it means these reality stars could face 50 years in jail and a $1 million fine! As if that’s not bad enough, in November the couple were hit with TWO MORE  fraud charges on their rap sheet, and Joe was cited for careless driving in a school zone. All in all, their lawyers are working overtime!

 

3. Amanda Bynes

[Photo: Twitter]

We hate to include it, but it feels weird leaving it out…The former Nickelodeon starlet made some serious headlines this year, and not exactly the good kind. The first major red flag came in the form of her puzzling tweets, in which she showed off her dramatic new fashion style and started beefs with Rihanna, Drake, and pretty much everyone we can think of. From there it got much worse. After a slew of traffic violations and driving-related offenses, the 27-year-old got into trouble with the law for allegedly dropping a bong (or “vase”) out the window of her Manhattan high-rise. There were some court appearances, but the final straw came when Bynes started a fire in the driveway of a random home in Thousand Oaks, CA. This event led to her arrest and she was and placed under a psychiatric hold when a doctor diagnosed her as suffering from bipolarity and schizophrenia. Click here for her complete saga, but we’re just glad she’s getting the help that she needs.

2. Chris Brown

[Photo: Getty Images]

Breezy just can’t stay away from the law! In January he fought with Frank Ocean over a parking space outside of a L.A. recording studio. It was a he said/he said situation, with both sides claiming the other swung first, but we DO know that punches flew and the LASO was called to sort the matter out. Parking lots proved just as unlucky in March, when Brown reportedly exploded over a $10 valet fee. Apparently he was pissed because he had only been at the venue for 30 minutes and didn’t feel like he had to pay the full parking amount. A saner member of the entourage tried to smooth the situation over by saying “We got the money … don’t worry about it,” but Chris shot him down. ”We gonna turn this whole thing on out,” he was heard to shout. Most recently, Brown was arrested for felony assault outside Washington D.C.’s W Hotel in the early morning hours of October 27th. Apparently a man jumped into a photo Brown was taking with two women, and Brown (or his body guard, depending on the version) broke the man’s nose. Who threw the punch is up for debate, but Brown spent 36 hours in jail and was hurriedly dispatched to rehab for anger management soon after. Although it’s not for certain, the 24-year old entertainer has intimated that he may retire from music following the release of his album X early next year.

 

1. Renee Zellweger

[Photo: Getty Images]

And finally, poor Renee, who seems to have plastic surgery’ed herself unrecognizable.

[Photo: Splash News Online/Getty Images]

VH1 Music Editor + Seltzer Enthusiast
@jordanruntagh