Kendall Jenner’s Wax Figure Is Not Having Any of Your S–t

*Judging you*

Kendall Jenner’s wax figure is the most livid object in our solar system.

Like most celeb wax figures, it’s pretty convincing to be the real thing because RBF bb Kendall isn’t here for anyone’s crap either. She isn’t here for Tyga crashing girls vacation. She isn’t here dad Caitlyn acting up. And she certainlty isn’t here for maternity pioneer Farrah Abraham’s life choices.

We s–t you not though, when Kendall met her Madame Tussauds wax figure today, she was here for it, only the figure wasn’t. Here’s what else it’s not here for.

  • Here it is judging you worse than Satan after you ate a whole Costco bulk of Doritos in one sitting.

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    You glutenous monster.

  • Or judging you from afar when it hears you scream an inhumane shrill because your favorite song came on at the club.

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    If you think it’ll dance with you, you have another thing coming.

  • Here she is when you tell her you’re breaking up with your douchebag boyfriend for the fifth time.

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    If she hears about it one more time she will murder you both.

  • She even judges you with her peripherals when you demand a discount from the cashier for a slightly ripped shirt at H&M.

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    No one has time for that crap, especially not a fake person frozen in time.

  • This is when you act like you love pizza so much but really cry after one bite then stay at the gym for three days straight.

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    You know who you are, Jennifer Lawrence.

  • It isn’t even having Kendall Jenner, its source of inspiration.

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    It wants that bitch out of its face STAT.

  • In fact, it would rather be a melted pile of witchcraft gone wrong than in Kendall’s presence.

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    Too repulsed to ever breathe again.

Like wax figure, like real person.

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#Pissed

Pizza is bae. And yes, I still say bae.
@taylorferber