Daisy de la Hoya Opens Up About Her Battle with Substance Abuse After Rock of Love

"Those things have come to the surface and I’ve been dealing with them as they come."

Daisy de la Hoya stole America's hearts on the second season of Rock of Love with Bret Michaels. In an exclusive interview with VH1, Daisy explains that there was a line between Daisy on TV and the real-life Daisy. The musicians opens up her substance abuse and her journey to reconnecting with her estanged mother after 13 years.

It's been a while since we've heard from the Daisy de la Hoya. Catch us up on your life.

Daisy de la Hoya: I've been doing a lot of traveling around the world and working on music and getting involved in activism and animals rights. I'm actually going back to school right now. I'm going for performing arts.

Where are you going to school?

I haven’t decided yet because right now I’m just finishing up some up um pre-college stuff. I would really like to go to Australia but we'll see uh what happens and where I can go.

How did Rock of Love come to be for you? Were you pursuing music and acting before you found reality TV?

I had been pursing the arts for pretty much all my life and I found the [Rock of Love] casting director on MySpace. MySpace was popular at the time and I contacted them. They told me to send a video tape and within a three days because they were already sorta done with their casting but they wanted to give me a shot so I sent it in and then two weeks later I was on the show.

Did you feel like you knew what to expect going into the house?

Yes, I had watched the first season of the show so I already knew kinda what to expect. I never experienced that kind of atmosphere that they you know were working in for a TV show. That was my first television show I ever did so I just sorta went with the flow.

You ended up getting your own solo show Daisy of Love, what was that experience like?

I felt very grateful and extremely lucky and really excited and just on top of the world. To know that people were that interested in me and that the producers and everyone at VH1 thought I was you know "something." They saw something in me and I thought that was just magical. It was definitely you know scary and stressful. It's hard to, you know, you gotta be interesting and funny, and beautiful or whatever and hopefully people love you and they watch you and your career flourishes and you go on [Laughs]

Did the show feel real? Did you feel like you were pushed to behave a way?

For me as an aspiring actress and someone who aspires to be in the entertainment business I have been lucky enough to have a taste of it. As an artist, I'm vulnerable to whatever people who are making a show or whatever it is want to get out of me because that’s my job. I just went with whatever they wanted me to do. I was fluid and I was very vulnerable because that’s the position people probably wanted you know be able to put yourself in so that you can easily be affected and I was. All the feelings and all those things were documented genuinely because I let myself go like that and I let myself do that because I wanted to create something authentic.

How authentic were your feelings for Bret then?

At that moment in time they were authentic but that was also my job. Did it go any further than what it is? You know I had to separate the two. You gotta separate the reality from the TV show. There's Daisy and then Daisy on the show and those lines don’t blend. I mean, they do sometimes but you know outside of that it wasn't real.

Some people we've spoken to really seem to fall for the person they've been competing for. Did you feel like other women there were really falling for Bret?

I have no idea. What I do know is that if there was something that would have been able to transpire after the show on a more personal level without the cameras then that would be up to you know each individual but I honestly I didn’t really see that.

What's your favorite behind the scenes moment, something we didn't see play out on camera?

Oh God well. There was a lot of great moments. I think some of the girls just sorta being as free as possible and really getting to know Bret on a different level and you know getting to experience his talents firsthand with his music and stuff. I think that was really cool as a musician and all that so I think that’s great. I just feel the whole entire thing was a great experience.

Do you have any regrets about participating on reality TV?

I don’t because I think that I was very lucky to be a part of something that was a big deal and a show that you know was successful at that time. People became fans of mine, even to this day and I'm just blown away by it all. I'm so grateful and thankful to those people because they really changed my life. Hopefully I inspired them in some way as well. The only thing that I regret is, maybe not a regret. [Laughs] Sometimes you get lost in the moment and you really never savor the moment.

Have you maintained any relationships on from any of the reality shows you participated on?

Sure, of course, because we're all human and we all connect but, at the end of the day, life goes on and we all go on to our next thing.

You've battled substance abuse since after the show, can you talk about that?

I grew up with a background. I was just born into this type of thing which is something that I have been doing for a long time and [this lifestyle] just maybe amplified it. I think it takes a certain type of personality. I think that’s just a part of who I am but I've overcome those things now.

To pursue acting and rock n' roll, that's what I did, and so along with that came sorta the baggage that I had already been carrying with me when I was a kid and I’ve had to deal with that. That's something I've been doing for most of the time since the shows ended. Those things have come to the surface and I’ve been dealing with them as they come. The good news is that I'm dealing with it, I've dealt with it and I do understand and hopefully you know grown as person and hop I can inspire other people in that way, as well.

I read that you've been sober for two years.

Yes, it might be a little longer. It might be three years now but definitely two years. It's an ongoing process. I'm just trying to hold myself up. I'm trying to reunite with my mother who I have not actually spoke to in 13 years, so that’s a big deal for me and also very painful but this is all a part of the healing process and journey of a human being. My journey at least.

Are you still pursuing music?

Yes. My current project is called Black Star Electra but I'm actually getting ready to start another solo project and the name of that is called Ghost Generation. My music has a lot to do with who I am, obviously and the struggles that I’ve gone through and my relationships and I’m getting a little more political and a little more righteous with what I wanna say to people because I think that’s important. I want to be there to help inspire people to do better and be better and not stand for anything less. I write what's happened to me so it’s really raw and it comes from my heart and soul and it may not be the best music and people might not always like it but I know that it's true. When it comes this is what really comes out of me so I can’t give any more than that. I can hopefully get better at it but it’s gonna always have to come from my soul.

Would you ever consider doing reality TV again, Daisy?

I would. Now it would be pretty traumatic for everybody [Laughs] but sure. If you’re willing to put yourself out there like that and then that’s what it is. If you’re willing to let people read your personal diary, that's what it is. I have never been afraid of that. I've never been afraid to let people see who I am or let people see whatever it is because I don’t have any things I’m embarrassed about or ashamed. There should be no reason for it. I’m not a bad person. I don’t maliciously go out and hurt people. If anybody cared I would always open my life for people to see if that help to inspire them.