Chrissy Teigen Recaps 'Model Employee': "I Will Touch Anything To Win A Challenge"
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While having the cameras capture the contestants slash models slash aspiring spokespersons' every move on Model Employee helps us better gauge who deserves to go home with the grand prize, it's nice to have another pair of eyes on the inside. In addition to being the barer of interesting news, by delivering word of what their next challenge will be (and looking fabulous while doing so), host Chrissy Teigen is providing us with insight as to what went down behind the scenes during the team's month-long bender in Las Vegas.
First, a look at challenges two and three, to help those friends who are currently catching up on what they may have missed. Take it away, Chrissy...
Alright, in true Chrissy fashion, I'm here with an uber-late blog post of episodes 2 and 3 of Model Employee!!
Truth be told, I have been working my own bum off going back and forth from coast to coast, talking my tiny Asian butt off about how awesome this show is; I think I have been on 20 airplanes this month alone, for real. Every time I watch an episode, it seriously feels like
yesterday.
So let's do this: RECYCLING CENTER CHALLENGE: Dude. Am I the only one who was thinking, "Whaaaaat the hell is the big effing deal here?" I mean, okay, I know I wasn't forced into any of those situations, but I wholeheartedly believe that if I had been, I would have seen those horrid outfits (PS I love that the girls still put on makeup for sorting trash) and completely been down to do it, too. The ONLY, ONLY thing that seemed a bit daunting was Jassmine saying, "There's stuff splashin' in my mouth". Good god. I will touch anything to win a challenge, but random human excrement, lube, cigarette water--I kind of draw the line when it comes to INGESTING IT.
Here's to hoping some half-full liquor bottles came down the line. I would not be above examining that bottle and perhaps taking a sippy. Okay, I just envisioned that, and maybe not...
It is always awesome to me seeing the girls in the actual events that got to showcase their spokesmodel abilities. I mean, the challenges are great, but what better way to prove you are good enough to be the spokesperson for Mandalay Bay than by doing the exact same tasks that would be demanded of you as the spokesperson for Mandalay Bay?
I'm sure the girls got a lot of s--t for possibly not knowing the hotel inside and out, but, as someone who is in these situations constantly, I really like how Shannone was able to so eloquently state that she really didn't know much. I think there is a huge difference between that and saying something completely wrong (which I do ALL THE TIME) I.E. Aspen calling the Mandalay Bay a factory of sorts. High five, Aspen. Together we shall be the queens of faux-pas!
This led to Aspen being called "unintelligent" by Patrick, which led to ice heart Chrissy getting a little bit of a pain inside. I've been called a lot of things, every day, but that one would sting.
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Moving on to the shark tank challenge. Oh man. I wonder if that was a little gross for people to watch? I mean if you follow my Twitter, you know I am no stranger to talking about my period. Who cares. We get periods. But this was one Aunt Flo-filled episode. Quote of the night obviously goes to Head Detective Johanna, who, in the interrogation room of the dinner table asked, "IS THERE BLOOD IN YOUR VAGINA OR NOT???"
It was obvious to me that by this episode the girls were getting extremely frustrated with the theme of "poor Brit". What I got to see and what the girls got to see were completely different, but she does seem completely non threatening. We'll see, though...
Anyhoo, periods aside, the challenged seemed really, really awesome. I can't even swim and I panic in deep water so I would have obviously sucked ass at this one. But if I could pick between chilling with some land-loving shark or cutting up frozen rats, I would choose the shark for sure. I remember sitting behind the scenes and having one of the show guys run in and say, "The rats....one is...was....pregnant"--all while I was eating my chicken lettuce cups. I still finished my lettuce cups of course, but Jesus Christ, that's gross.
The next episode is definitely one of the most exciting to me--it was a chance for me to FINALLY be able to interact with these girls in a fun atmosphere. Can't wait for you guys to see!
One million period-y hugs and kisses.
x
Be sure to follow the lovely Chrissy on Twitter, and catch an all-new episode of Model Employee on Wednesday at 11/10 C.