The Victoria's Secret Fashion Show airs tonight at 10 PM on CBS. It will undoubtedly feature perfect-looking models doing perfect things that make us cry tears of inferiority and hate-eat pizza. The show is truly one of pop culture's most polarizing events. Many claim it promotes an unrealistic standard of beauty for women--it's simply impossible to be that flawless. Well, they're right: It is.
These seven moments prove it. Even the people marketed to us as "perfect" have their public blunders. From the top VS Angels (we're looking at you, Tyra Banks!) to the glitzy A-list performers (Ariana Grande, anyone?) everyone has experienced a not-so-glossy moment on the world's most talked-about runway. Check them out below, and take pleasure in knowing these peeps are just like us--goofy faces and all.
When Tyra Banks lost a "trillion-dollar" bracelet on the runway.
Even the runway (and smizing) queen isn't immune to catwalk catastrophes. During the 2005 runway show, Tyra was getting her life to Snoop Dogg's "Drop It Like It's Hot" when a tiny--but expensive-as-hell--bracelet fell off her wrist. Like a pro, she kept on strutting, but spilled the hefty tea backstage. "I have no idea where it went," she said. Yikes. Did it come out of her paycheck?
The time Karolina Kurkova's shoe fell off.
Karolina's shoe clearly had a mind of its own during the 2006 show. Lady K started strutting, but the shoe decided it would rather hang back and enjoy the show. Can't say we blame it, really. To be real, we wish we could've seen the aftermath of this. Did a panicked PA come running on stage to fetch said rogue shoe? Was the person responsible for fastening the pump on Karolina axed? So much drama for one tiny pump!
And the same happened to Natasha Poly.
Natasha's footwear faux pas during the 2005 show was a little more problematic. The model ditched her heel while other models were walking in close proximity. This could've been really bad. Can't you just picture all the trips? It would be like Domino Rally up in there! Thankfully, Natasha picked up the shoe after turning on the catwalk and scurried off the stage. We applaud her for preventing what could've easily been Shoegate 2005.
When Doutzen Kroes had a misstep during the finale walk.
I'm not quite sure what happened here. Did she drop something? Trip over a rhinestone? Decide to purposefully screw things up to make show-runners sweat bullets? (Hopefully the third.) All you see is Doutzen reach down to pick up something (probably) fabulous and throw off the whole lineup. It's a cringe-worthy moment, amplified by "I Want Candy" playing in the background. Maybe she imagined a literal piece of candy on the floor and reached for it? I would've done the same darn thing.
And Cara Delevingne had a literal exorcism during Lady Gaga's "Applause."
This girl is our religion. During the 2013 finale walk, Ms. Delevingne decided to let her inner goofball fly, and the results are hilarious. With a gaping mouth, eyes rolled in the back of her head and skiddish strut full throttle, the Paper Towns star looks like something out of The Exorcist. Orrrrr pint night at a college dive bar.
Obviously, when Ariana Grande made the face of death after an angel almost knocked her off the runway.
It became one of our favorite memes in 2014. The image of tiny Ariana cowering in fear of a "Fee-fi-fo-fum" model needs to be on T-shirts, coffee mugs, bumper stickers and tattooed on our face ASAP. According to the story, VS Angel Elsa Hosk didn't see Ariana in her field of vision while the pop star was performing, and the rest is history. Models, demons and doughnuts--Ariana's three greatest fears, apparently.
And lastly, when Hozier performed "Take Me to Church."
Did anything awkward happen? Not necessarily. The SMH component comes from the fact Victoria's Secret thought it was an A+ idea to have models cheekily walk to a somber tune. Hozier is great and all, but seriously, WTF? They couldn't have booked a more upbeat act--or at least done a "Take Me to Church" bubblegum remix? This is one performance that should ask for forgiveness.